Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I just want nice things and good sex
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
