Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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