Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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