Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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