hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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