If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.