There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
