I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
