he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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