Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Enjoy the penises
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Randomize
