Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
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