So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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