You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize