Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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