You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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