I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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