Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
