i always forget guys have bellybuttons
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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