Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
