Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
