Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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