Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
