So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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