just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
