Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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