I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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