ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize