so that wasnt chicken after all
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
