? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
