people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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