at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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