it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
