He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i drank out of a bidet.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
