In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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