The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
