How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
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