no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
