none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
