RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
