I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
