Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
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I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
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And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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