I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
