Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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