i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
