I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
