Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
COCAINE IS GR8
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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