I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
