So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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