I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
