so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
