Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.

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  (704): Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends (704): Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/v731
  Replies (46) Good night (3608) Bad night (460)
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  (209): View more from California

  I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.

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  (209): I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own. http://tfl.nu/zoa7
  Replies (72) Good night (785) Bad night (3252)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."

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  (718): Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom." http://tfl.nu/h2e6
  Replies (17) Good night (4677) Bad night (1337)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.

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  (443): BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup. http://tfl.nu/0lqk
  Replies (22) Good night (3149) Bad night (792)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.

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  (248): Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks. http://tfl.nu/vf46
  Replies (89) Good night (1364) Bad night (22398)
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  (408): View more from California

  We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.

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  (408): We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old. http://tfl.nu/3zai
  Replies (17) Good night (5797) Bad night (742)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.

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  (210): I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer. http://tfl.nu/a3pu
  Replies (8) Good night (3159) Bad night (615)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture

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  (928): Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture http://tfl.nu/vg21
  Replies (3) Good night (1637) Bad night (1024)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?

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  (843): I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out? http://tfl.nu/h2y5
  Replies (19) Good night (2223) Bad night (701)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.

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  (920): Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be. http://tfl.nu/nyya
  Replies (2) Good night (1288) Bad night (592)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...

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  (701): Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter... http://tfl.nu/1omr
  Replies (0) Good night (588) Bad night (213)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.

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  (201): Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour. http://tfl.nu/pcyi
  Replies (8) Good night (441) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire

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  (404): Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire http://tfl.nu/4cfz
  Replies (3) Good night (288) Bad night (403)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with

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  (609): this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with http://tfl.nu/msu7
  Replies (0) Good night (277) Bad night (354)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"

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  (305): I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me" http://tfl.nu/ic9y
  Replies (0) Good night (408) Bad night (127)

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